Happy New Year.
Sharing vocals will be more difficult for me than instrumental work. There's more vulnerability. This isn't about the lyrics as much as the voice itself, which is very immediate. While I may know exactly what I'm trying to say lyrically and musically, the intonation of my voice itself may betray something that I hadn't planned on sharing. You might hear it before I do. I guess this is fitting for a publication where to some extent I'd like my notes to unfold "in front of you."
Also appropriate is the fact that the first vocal piece I share with you, a draft of the song “Blank Ink,” is about finding truth (the "you" of this song), through art. By art I was more in mind of writing and instrumental music since singing isn't something I've done much, but now that I sing these words I'm more aware of another layer of truth revealed in vocalization.
In lyrics or poetry we can locate truth that it’s hard to express through literal language, but I think when we vocalize those same words, they can show another side of themselves we hadn't accounted for when writing them. Paradoxically, by adding additional vocals (the harmony parts I sing) I was probably doing more to conceal the truth in my singular voice than to amplify it.
Here are the words to "Blank Ink."
I once found words to lift me up with a floating inside my chest Now I find words are my boundary They carry only as far as my breath When I was new you withdrew I was tossed into the mist and still I want to thank you I would be lost if not for this Back then I wanted to know you You stopped at night but I slept on I felt the truth in the morning my little curtain was drawn Yet I know truth is fleeting like skipping rocks on an evening lake Today is bracing with lightness Coffee brimming inside my cup I’m spilling into the blackness Sink down I must before drinking it up You made me endless and empty that you could fill me again and again as my white pages do drinketh silent ink from a white pen
We talk about "finding our voice" in art, music, writing, etc. Surely this is an ongoing process, but by now I can hear aspects of my "voice" in the instrumental music I create, which is most of what I share here. I will share vocal work from time to time, though, and it will be fun (and probably a little scary) to find more of myself in the process.
Share this post